Re-setting Often:
A continual invitation to reflect, be intentional, and begin anew.
I love the concept of a re-set. It’s contrary to all or nothing thinking that grips us with a narrative that “I’m either good or bad, a success or a failure, productive or lazy, disciplined or completely unmotivated.” It instead elevates the continuous invitation to reflect, evaluate, and begin again. It reminds us that “mercies are new every morning” and that we can make shifts in our lives.
A re-set can occur in big, dramatic ways, but it also can be infinitesimal. A re-set can be about the small, the mostly imperceptible, the ways that others would never notice on the outside. Both the grand re-sets and the small re-sets can hold so much meaning and purpose when they move us more towards how we want to live—towards meaning and alignment with what we value.
Re-sets can happen across so many aspects of our lives—our homes, our bodies, our finances, our relationships, out thoughts, our work, our parenting, and our beliefs. Re-sets can happen around how we spend our time and our approach to the habits that make up our days.
Re-sets might just happen to us in the face of something very big—significant life changes, trauma and grief and loss, yet often re-sets are ours for claiming. By paying attention and reflecting on how we are living, how we feel, and how our relationships are going, we can notice whether there is an invitation towards a re-set.
Re-sets are an opportunity to begin again with intention moving towards what we value most, so that we live in alignment with core values. This may mean cultivating grace and self-compassion towards both yourself and others, so that you allow for new beginnings. This may mean trying again tomorrow even if today you fell short of your values. This may mean saying “I’m sorry” and working to repair a relationship or a circumstance.
Re-sets may be as simple as deciding to brush your teeth, comb your hair, or take a shower. Re-sets may mean beginning to nourish your body, move your body, or discern what substances you want or do not want in your body. Re-sets may mean taking a day off in which you fill it intentionally with choices and people that support your well-being. Re-sets may mean tuning into a deeper sense of faith and meaning in your life. Re-sets may look like taking out the trash, doing some dishes, and cleaning out a closet. Re-sets may look like beginning to tell the truth, to take off the mask, and to be more real. Re-sets may look like beginning to read, to play, or to notice and/or create beauty. Re-sets may look like a hug, a text, a phone call—moving towards connection with intention. Re-sets may look like evaluating your time and attention and discerning boundaries around your commitments. Re-sets may simply be about naming what you value most and beginning again or for the first time to press into and be intentional about what you value.
The transition to the new year is not the only time to consider a re-set. There is no formula or one size fits all approach to this, but instead a continual invitation towards reflection and intention.
For Reflection
Can you relate to ALL or NOTHING thinking?
How can embracing the concept of a re-set being available to you help you move towards living in more alignment with your values?
Where are you experiencing an invitation towards a re-set? Remember that even the smallest of ways counts.
I am now in network with Blue Cross Blue Shield. I am a provider through Blue Cross Blue Shield of Tennessee, but someone can have any Blue Cross Blue Shield health insurance in order to see me.
This episode is all about operating from an inherent sense of worthiness independent of all the things that we sometimes look at to prove or disprove our worth. This is relevant for adults, but also applicable for older kids, teens, and young adults. This content directly reflects a hope that I have for my clients as well as my children—that they would know that they have incredible worth as they are.
This episode encourages movement towards living authentically instead of clinging so tightly to perfectionism. Because perfection is not realistic and also so rigid, consider instead what you value and living in a way that lines up with your values.
As I look back on 2024, one of the greatest highlights was beginning the Narrating Hope podcast. If you have not listened in to these initial episodes, I hope that you will! Follow along on Apple or Spotify. Please share with others and consider leaving a review!
Episode #1: Held & Free
Episode #2: Delight in Small Things
Episode #3: Name your Values
Episode #4: Friendship that Refreshes
Episode #5: Friendship in Life Transitions
Episode #6: What am I Carrying?
Episode #7: Let’s Talk about Needs
Episode #8: What Makes Me Feel Like a Person?
Episode #9: Self-Compassion
Episode #10: Rhythms of Work, Rest, and Play
Episode #11: Holidays: Grief and Meaning Making
Episode #12: Gratitude and Narrative
Episode #13: Feeling Overwhelmed Before Christmas
I am excited to partner again with Hilarie Robison to offer a Healthy Dating in person evening!! Due to kind requests, it is now open to sons AND daughters... and moms or dads! Local Chattanoogans—come as a parent-child pair for a meaningful night of shared learning and inspiration. Individuals are also welcome. Early bird registration by February 7!!! Register here: https://forms.gle/wGH7ZyvkX6RJVrc46
I appreciated the opportunity to contribute recently to “Six Ways to Embrace Slow Living This Winter” featured by Rent. Read more here, and be sure to read to the end.
Consider if you might be comfortable sharing a google review! Google reviews are not confidential, so please make sure you are comfortable with your name being on the internet. Google reviews can be about any aspect of my work—workshops, speaking, podcast, writing, etc. I welcome reviews as this helps people connect with me. Search Burton Counseling, PLLC to leave a review.
Counseling--In person and online for individual adults living in Tennessee, Mississippi, and Georgia. Focus areas include anxiety and stress, grief, life transitions, relationships, and self-worth, yet work extends into depression and other areas. Counseling work is more comprehensive in terms of holding space for exploration of the past, present functioning, and future goals. More information on counseling can be found here.
Coaching--In person and online sessions are available without geographic restrictions. Coaching works extends to couples looking to strengthen connection and attachment, communication, etc. I also work with individuals on personal goals including learning to care for self while caring for others, career transitions, parenting support, learning to set boundaries, etc. Coaching work is more focused on present and future goals. More information can be found here.
Course & Workshops & Speaking--Individual and community opportunities for growth, reflection, and conversation related to various mental health and wellness themes. The self-paced, online course on anxiety and stress is described here, and more information about workshops can be found here. I also am available for speaking to groups about mental health and wellness themes.
Writing & Podcast--I love to share mental health and wellness themes through writing and the Narrating Hope podcast. Join me in these conversations by reading and listening and consider sharing with a friend. The podcast is available on Apple and Spotify.
Supervision—I am offering supervision for counselors working towards licensure in the state of Tennessee! I am so excited about the chance to help counselors grow.